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Hey, Daddy! Gay men who hate their bodies

You get enough negativity in your life without turning on yourself. Daddy helps three guys take a look in the mirror and start to love what they see as the start, not the goal ,of the journey.

Hey, Daddy!
My dick is way too big. Before you start chastising me about a problem other guys wish they had, it really is. It gets the wrong kind of attention and drives away quality guys.

My boyfriend, an otherwise confirmed bottom, refuses to even attempt it. Should I keep trying to coax him with lube and dildos? Should I break up and look for a size queen?

I’ve considered drastic measures, even surgery, but nothing seems viable. All I know is I hate my dick. What would you recommend?
But It’s Ginormous. Really.

Dear BIGR:
You didn’t indicate what we’re working with here – beer can, eggplant or medical anomaly? Since you mention guys who like your penis the way it is, I assume it’s not physically impossible to manage. In most cases, big is in the booty of the beholder.

Stop hating your dick. It’s part of you. Devoting such negative energy toward yourself can be as dangerous as an elective surgery to your penis, which is dangerous and won’t work by the way.

I do get your drift, though. It’s hard to hear that you’re not packing the equipment to do the job a guy wants done – for any reason. If he’s willing, by all means continue to try with your boyfriend. If he’s not, have fun with literally every other sexual option under the sun.

Also if he’s agreeable, and you can’t live without penetration, consider adding a third to your sexploits.

Only you can answer if this is a relationship dealbreaker or not, but don’t give up a worthwhile relationship without a fight.

Hey, Daddy!
No matter how much I work out or how much I spend on haircuts and clothes, I hate what I see in the mirror. I’m short, curly haired and big in the butt. Without the physical requirements, how can I attract the love of just one good man?
He’s Over Trying To Improve Exterior

Dear HOTTIE:
First, short with curly hair and a big butt is my dream lay. Second, there are no physical requirements for love. Third, and channeling Ru-Know-Who shamelessly, if you can’t love yourself, how the hell are you going to love somebody else?

Daddy loves his boys. He knows the answers you need, and you’re going to get them. Reach out with your burning questions via our editor, mike@davidatlanta.com, and put “Hey, Daddy” in the subject line.  Warning: Advice in this column is intended for entertainment and novelty. Proceed at your own risk. If you’re in trouble, ask a professional for help.

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