Breaking up isn’t just hard to do. It can be living hell. Daddy offers counsel on when to talk it out, when to cut bait, and how to move on.
After a year of passionate sex and genuine laughs, we broke up. It was mutual, and it was the right thing to do, but the only person I want to talk to about it is him.
Everything reminds me of him. Inside jokes, our show, our place all make me want to text him. I don’t want to get back together, but I miss him.
I don’t want to give the wrong impression, but I do want to talk. What should I do?
Truly Admit Loving Kindness Is Never Gone
What you’re experiencing is grief, and the impulse to talk to him is understandable. But don’t, at least not yet. Opening old wounds early extends your distress.
The grieving process is how you move on. Absorb memories and internalize how much the relationship meant to you. Think about why breaking up was the right thing to do.
You might try a ritual: Write a letter pouring out the good, bad and ugly. Now – and this step is crucial – don’t send it. Put it and your former relationship away. Or further, burn it and release the past into the air.
My ex and I were together seven years, but the last year was a lie. He cheated repeatedly, promising each time not to do it again. He moved out without discussing what made him do it.
I see him at the bars enjoying his singlehood, but I can’t stop wondering what happened. I deserve an explanation. How do I get it?
Couldn’t Handle Even A Talk Explaining Dalliances
Wondering what motivates other people is tempting, but futile. There are probably tons of “reasons,” but speculating on theories only delays your recovery. Turn your energy toward the person you can control and who needs your help: You.
What would you do differently? Did you put up with it too long? Did you invest in someone who wasn’t earning it? How do you find a man who respects your relationship as much as you do?
The closure you seek will come in the form of lessons learned.
Daddy loves his boys. He knows the answers you need, and you’re going to get them. Reach out with your burning questions via our editor, firstname.lastname@example.org, and put “Hey, Daddy” in the subject line. Warning: Advice in this column is intended for entertainment and novelty. Proceed at your own risk. If you’re in trouble, ask a professional for help.