In case you somehow managed to miss it, TMZ posted a video of Nicki Minaj and Mariah Carey in a verbal altercation on the set of American Idol. It went down like this:
Nicki: Think I’m playin’? Think this shit is a fucking joke? Think it’s a joke? Think it’s a joke? Think it’s a joke? Say one more disrespectful thing to me, if you say one more disrespectful thing to me — off with your head!
Mariah: I am not being disrespectful.
Nicki: Off with your head, off with your head. Don’t tell me I’m insecure, don’t tell me I’m inadequate. […] You’re the insecure one sittin’ up there running down her resume every five minutes. Every time you take a shot at me I’ma take it back, and if you gotta fucking problem then handle it. I told them, I’m not fucking putting up with your fucking highness over there … figure it the fuck out. Figure it out.
Mariah: Whyyyy, whhyyyy do I have a 3-year-old sitting around me?
Nicki: I’m not sitting here for 20 minutes and having you run down your resume everyday, No! Goodbye!
Mariah: Listen … I can’t see my kids because you decided to make … to have … to have a little baby fit and going all around the stage.
Nicki: Good, well then go see them now, go see them now … you’re boring as fuck.
Mariah Carey: $550 million net worth, two decades in the game, over 200 million albums sold worldwide. Nicki Minaj: $14 million net worth, eight years in the game, 2.8 million album sales worldwide. Take a seat, Nicki.
Kim Kardashian spoke to Tatler Magazine, where she revealed she’s already plotting her next wedding: “The next time, I want to do it on an island with just my friends and family and that’s it.” This is our chance to rid ourselves of the Kardashians, America! Desert them on that private island and leave them to survive off of her ample ass meat.
Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman have called it quits after 30 years of marriage. The two married in 1982 and have two children together. It’s always sad to see the demise of such a seemingly perfect marriage, but I suppose the real question is, who will get custody of Mara Wilson?
Jennifer Garner recently told Ellen DeGeneres that her husband, Ben Affleck, has “wonder sperm.” While appearing on The Tonight Show, Jay Leno asked Ben about his wonder sperm, which led him to clarify that she was “misquoted” and what she actually meant was that he has a “wonder member.” You know, I’ll actually choose to believe this one, because he has no other discernable talents and I refuse to believe that a human being could be devoid of all talent. That, and now he’s going to make a much more intriguing addition to my spank bank.
According to Star Magazine, Jude Law is going through a midlife crisis that includes “staying up late, drinking, smoking, and eating junk food.” If those are the signs of a midlife crisis, I apparently started mine at 17.
Tom Ford is someone’s daddy and unfortunately it’s not me. He and his partner, Richard Buckley, announced that they are fathers to a newborn baby boy named Alexander John Buckley Ford, born September 23rd in Los Angeles. Many congrats to the happy couple.