What a Drag

February 15, 2012 | by Tristan Timothy

So recently I’ve discovered RuPaul’s Drag Race. I know, I know, I’m like years late! I had seen it a couple times before but the new season has really drawn me in, which lead me to obsessively watch every other season online. Drag queens now show up in every one of my dreams (and sometimes nightmares, Sharon Needles! I DIE!) It’s even got me thinking…could I pull off a drag look?
Ok, the answer to that question is no. I’m too much of a boy (at this point a man really…ugh age!) I’m not saying all drag queens are girly lady boys, but I just have too much leg and chest hair to pull it off. My drag name would be Halle Hairy.

The more queens I meet personally I am always surprised when they dispel stereotypes that I had heard. Like I was so surprised to find out that most drag queens (that I’ve met anyways) happen to favor the top bunk, so to speak. The one time I had sexual relations with a drag queen I ran into this issue. (I say issue because it turned into one of those wrestling for top situations.)

I met him as a boy months before I ever found out he did drag. We hit it off and chatted and danced the night away and kept in touch but never had more contact than that one night. He was a pretty boy but the fact that he was a drag queen never came up. I guess the fact that he was hanging out in a group of drag queens should have tipped me off but I was fresh from the West Coast and naive to the ways of the Southern gay world.
Fast-forward a couple months to a quiet night at Jungle. There weren’t many people in the club and I ended up hanging out with a group of queens. We danced and drank and sashayed around the club but it wasn’t until the end of the night that my new friend revealed that we actually knew each other. I had literally spent all night with this guy in his drag form and had no idea it was the same boy from months before. We decided to make our own after party and after he untucked we went for a late night stroll around the streets of Atlanta. Needless to say my preconception of drag queens being bottoms was proved wrong and our hook up didn’t go very far. (It also started pouring rain and we took shelter in a small concrete structure in an abandoned lot, so that part of it was fun.) The moral of the story is…Drag queens pack more than one surprise; don’t judge a book by its Cover girl.